Clothes make the Man
February 6th, 2010Okay so it’s been pretty much nearly a year since I’ve written in this thing. I’m currently no longer in the land of the rising sun. Sucks, but that’s life, it can’t always be sunshine and rainbows and pretty girls dressed in short skirts with legs that go on forever.
I digress.
Not really. I was actually on topic… sort of.
I recently failed at asking a girl out. Reason being I was stuck in the friends zone. I’m not really that attractive of a guy. It’s true. It’s true. On the interwebs I know most people are Brad Pitt or Megan Fox. I’m Joe Schmo. I don’t usually wear fancy clothes. I’m a casual person. I like classy girls. Unfortunately I never seem to attract their attention.
A super awesome mega friend who shall be dubbed… Katamari enlightened me on why I fail at these endeavors. 1) I’m pretty hideous, 2) Girls love confidence, as an Asian American my ball size is directly proportional to the amount of confidence I have, 3) If I want to get Classy girls, I have to be classy myself, and look the part.
Now, I can’t fix 1. Nothing short of plastic surgery and getting hit by a beauty stick could fix. Have to deal with the hand God gave me. 2 is a non-issue. I can fake confidence, by tricking myself into thinking I have some grande huevos. 3 was fixable but problematic. I enjoy my casual clothing. I enjoy wearing t-shirts and khakis and looking very relaxed. Katamari pointed out I wanted to hunt Dolphins when I was using prunes as bait. Not that this analogy makes any more sense than Mayonnaise and french fries, but it works.
I basically had to change my look.
So me and Katamari end up going shopping. Not as painful as it sounds. Girls who go shopping… that’s painful. Girls who shop for guys, quick and painless.
We went from store to store: Forever 21, H & M, Old Navy, Active, and several other stores.
I had to update my look so Katamari convinced me to wear Jeans. I haven’t worn Jeans since i was maybe… 8. Don’t know why. Maybe I had some traumatic experience as a kid, like the fly got caught in my… well you can finish that sentence. Or a pair of Jeans tried to maul me, who knows. She also tried to convince me to wear colors that I pretty much avoid. Not happening. She also tried to get me to like a polo shirt with a terrible color combination scheme. It was a nice polo but the red… ruined the blue… ugh…
Eventually after 3 hours of searching we find a good combination of a black dressy shirt with dark Jeans. I must say I did enjoy the look. I apparently also had some semblance of a butt. I’m impressed.
Now this may feel like I’m once again off topic since I mentioned earlier about girls and such and such, but this is actually the set up for the incident which occurred roughly… 4 hours ago. I should also state I went clothes shopping for this incident. Not to say this incident specifically but to have some sort of incident.
It was my friend’s B-day bash, and she turned 21. I had prepared a bunch of spring rolls for people to eat and was feeling good that I was going to look like a bad ass with awesome food.
Well its time for the party and I head over. Despite being late by 15 minutes I’m the first to be there. I set down the food and wait for people to arrive. 30 some odd people soon trickle into the small apartment and there’s girls and guys taking up space everywhere. People devour my spring rolls in minutes. HAHA innuendo… the food genius.
The people that know me and know I brought the food start pointing to me when someone asked who brought it. Eventually one cute attractive girl, Mana in this case, asks who made it, finds out its me and asks for the recipe, I said sure I’ll give it to you later, but it’ll cost you since it’s a family recipe. She looked slightly upset but walks off.
Now at this point you’re possibly thinking, Mr. Canada you’re a dumbass, you screwed up. I would of agreed except what occurred afterwards.
I sat down and began writing down the recipe. At this point the hostess of the party talks to me and asks if I’m having fun and I am. She asks what I’m doing and I show her. She questions who wanted and I simply replied, I don’t know, the girl in the grey sweater. She points to one, and I simply reply that was the wrong one. A girl walks out and lo and behold its the one who asked for the recipe. It was Mana.
She looks to me and asks what I’m doing, I show her and she smiles and says I’m very nice for writing down the recipe for her. Her friend soon comes over… lets say Sakura. She sees it and asks whats going on. Man, I wonder how many times I’ve been asked that… anyways she finds out and we start talking. Now at this point they could of moved away, I would of given them the recipe at some point later but they both chose to stay to talk to me. Strange… They both sit on the floor, while I’m in the chair. I quickly finish writing, hand the recipe to Mana, and sit down on the floor with them to make them feel more comfortable.
We sit there and talk for quite awhile about alot of things. School, majors, where each of us are from. I find out they’re from the same university. Cool. They readjust themselves and sit closer. Now in America I believe this distance isn’t anything to write home about, but these are Japanese girls. Different environment. Of course they have been in America for 6ish months, so maybe they’ve adapted… So shit… We talk for a good 40 minutes together. They ask me alot of questions and they both ask of me to teach them to cook spring rolls. Now… this gave me a pretty big head. I mean complimented on my cooking skills and asking me to teach them individually… Yeah I think I’m reading way too much into this.
I would like to take a minute, just sit right there, I’ll tell you how I became interrogated by 2 girls from Japan. If you have the Fresh prince stuck in your head. Mission success.
When we were talking they would ask questions one after another, alternating between the two. This is a first. Most Japanese girls usually take their time in asking guys questions, and allow the guy to basically lead and do most of the talking, to gauge his level. Maybe I was too quiet? I don’t think so. Maybe they’ve been in America too long? 6ish months is not that long I think… Maybe they both secretly want to bone me in turn… only in my mind, in my mind… By the end of the conversation, I think they knew more about me than I did them.
They giggle and laugh and we continue talking and having a good time. Eventually it’s time for them to leave and they ask me to friend them on facebook. DONE.
During this time staring at not just one, but two attractive girls made my day. Having them laugh and smile made it a better day. It was then made even better because the two started to french each other… Okay only in my mind, could it have gotten better.
Now I mean no disrespect. I really don’t. This blog is the storm of thoughts in my head. These were two perfectly respectable girls, well dressed, in some sexy jeans I might add, who wanted to study abroad. They were both very pretty and could easily wrap any guy around their fingers. I might be one of them, but luckily I learned that they are leaving in 2 months time. Do I want to hit that? Yes. Am I going to? Noooooo. I’m not going to disrespect two girls in such a way. The time to spend together is too short, and I’d rather have a relationship with either of these two fine ladies, but that’s not going to happen. I’m weird I know.
I have to say that the clothing decisions of Katamari have paid off… but now I need more clothes to go to dinner with them, and to teach them to cook… I need more money…
Oh and no I will not share the spring roll recipe.